Redneck 12 Days of Christmas

Jeff Foxworthy

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Wow, somebody done been to the WalMart!
(Jeff) Man, this is the stuff I got for Christmas.
Well you cleaned up! Whadya git?

Five flannel shirts
Four big mud tires
Three shotgun shells
Two hunting dogs
... And some parts to a Mustang GT.

Hey Bubba, you got gypped -- there's 12 days to Christmas.
(Jeff) I know that, I got it covered. Look over in the corner.
That's yours too?
Yea!

Chorus:
Twelve-pack of Bud
Eleven Wrastling tickets
Ten o' Copenhagen
Nine years probation
Eight table dancers
Seven packs of Redman
Six cans of Spam
Five flannel shirts
Four big mud tires
Three shotgun shells
Two hunting dogs
... And some parts to a Mustang GT.

Man, this ain't normal Christmas presents!
No, they're redneck gifts!
Redneck gifts?
Yea, you know, like
if you buy your wife earrings that double as fishing lures.
Or, if you can burp the entire chorus of "Jingle Bells"
Perhaps if you think "The Nutcracker" is something you did off a high-dive.
Or, if you've ever misspelled something in Christmas lights.
Or, if you leave cold beer and pickled eggs for Santa Claus.

What's wrong with that?
I didn't say anything wrong with it...
It's hard to beat...

Chorus:
Twelve-pack of Bud
Eleven Wrastling tickets
Ten o' Copenhagen
Nine years probation
Eight table dancers
Seven packs of Redman
Six cans of Spam
Five flannel shirts
Four big mud tires
Three shotgun shells
Two hunting dogs
... And some parts to a Mustang GT.

Well, you can't really consider it a Christmas
'less you go down to the penitentiary and visit your mama.
You're not listenin' to me!
Get the car key outta your ear.
That's where the nine years probation comes in...
I'm gonna do it for ya again.
Now listen...

Chorus:
Twelve-pack of Bud
Eleven Wrastling tickets
Ten o' Copenhagen
Nine years probation
Eight table dancers
Seven packs of Redman
Six cans of Spam
Five flannel shirts
Four big mud tires
Three shotgun shells
Two hunting dogs
... And some parts to a Mustang GT.

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REDNECK PRIDE

Redneck Game
Have you ever taken beer to a job interview? Picked your teeth with a menu? Then you need Jeff Foxworthy's Redneck Board Game plum full o'Bubbas, beef jerky, and big laughs! Fill in the blanks on the question cards with the right answers to "fill your trailer." First full trailer is the ruler of the rednecks! $29.88

Redneck Christmas CD
Put on your flannel long johns and grab your best trucker cap as you celebrate the holidays with 14 of the best redneck holiday songs we've ever heard! You might be bonafide redneck if you've heard of "X-mas In Jail," "Leroy And The Redneck Reindeer," "All I Want For Christmas Is My Upper Plate," and the all-time favorite "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer," plus many more! Sung by famous country stars like Buck Owens, Travis Tritt, Charlie Daniels and more. Yee-haw! $12.98

Redneck Toilet Paper T-Shirt Brown
Picture of Leaf "What you see"...
Picture of Toilet Paper "What a Redneck sees"
Brown. $16.98

Redneck pewter buckle
Made of pewter. Confederate flag background. Fits belts up to 1 1/2 inches wide. $18

STICKERS

Redneck Thanksgiving: "Road Kill and a Six-Pack"

15" Holiday Redneck
Whether you're proud to be a redneck or proud to know one, send this hilarious, rugged, fun-lovin' Bear for the holidays and "git it done." He wears faux leather work boots, weathered jeans, a cut-off flannel shirt, and "Look Out, Grandma!" trucker's hat with antlers. Available in Honey, Buttercream, Vanilla, Dark Chocolate.

If This Flag Offends You It's Made My Day
Comes in T-Shirt, Sweatshirt, long-sleeve, scoop-neck or dress

More T-Shirts

Cowboy Boots Christmas Ornaments
SET OF 2 COWBOY BOOTS CHRISTMAS ORNAMENTS will make a special addition to your holiday decor.

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