You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch
Jim Carrey/Dr. Seuss
You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch,
You really are a heel,
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch.
You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel!
You're a monster, Mr. Grinch,
Your heart's an empty hole,
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch.
I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!
You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch,
You have termites in your smile.
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch.
Given the choice between the two of you
I'd take the seasick crocodile!
You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch,
You're the king of sinful sots,
Your heart's a dead tomato splotched
With moldy purple spots, Mr. Grinch.
You're a three decker sauerkraut
and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce!
You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch,
With a nauseous super "naus",
You're a crooked dirty jockey
And you drive a crooked hoss, Mr. Grinch.
Your soul is an appalling dump heap
Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of rubbish imaginable
Mangled up in tangled up knots!
You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch,
You're a nasty wasty skunk,
Your heart is full of unwashed socks,
Your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch.
The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote,
"Stink, stank, stunk!"
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